heartbreak, starting over, sewing a heart, broken heart, finding love

Coping With a Breakup 101: Top Tips to Help Get Over The Ex

Breakups are hard to overcome, and moving on can feel nearly impossible. You may want to just stay in bed and eat, but the best way to move on from a breakup is to get up, get out and get active. Refocus your mind away from the emotional pain and start moving your life forward. The three things to remember: be social, be active, be open to possibilities. Here are a few tips in these areas:

Be Social

Surround yourself with friends and family, and make an effort to meet new people. Visit websites like Meetup.com to find clubs for like-minded people who get out socialize. Groups range from knitting circles, sports teams, hiking groups, motorcycle clubs and independent filmmaker workshops.

Social interaction is healthy and will help you stop thinking about your miserable ex. By joining new groups, you might even pick up an unexpected hobby and find new ways to express yourself:

Like blogging!

Be Active

Another outlet for those sorrowful feelings is exercise. Go for a hike or a run. Get out your aggression through cardio, boxing or weightlifting. Try Pilates, yoga or Zumba. The endorphins produced through physical activity can alleviate those sad, yucky feelings and get you to see things in a more positive light. Endorphins also help by improving self-esteem and positivity and reducing your perception of pain. So get up off the couch and go for a run—it will even be a sweet bonus if you happen to run into your ex and have the chance to show off your newly fit body!

Go out dancing. Get some friends together and take a beginners dance class. Chose from tap, swing, hip hop, ballet, or ballroom—the style doesn’t matter. What’s important is that you’re getting out, taking part in an upbeat activity and getting those endorphins flowing.

Even a night out dancing at a club can be a great time among friends. And remember: Don’t take yourself too seriously. If you dance goofy then dance goofy. Laughing and smiling will help you feel better.

Be Open to New Possibilities

Always be open-minded about new possibilities. Go to a museum. Attend a local food or culture festival. Listen to live music in your local area. Ever tried boating? Boating is a fun activity that gets you outdoors, and with the wind blowing through your hair, you’ll feel your troubles melt away. If you have never done it before, now is a great time to learn. Research the best boating spots in your area and go online to obtain your boating license if necessary.

Take advantage of the different seasons and choose activities that pique your interest. From sight-seeing right in your own backyard or learning something new, to hiking, dancing, boating and running—these are the healthful activities that will have you on your way to emotional healing in no time.

The key to moving on after breakups is staying active. While it may seem impossible to crawl out of bed, you will be happier when you do. Remember to try new things and to be social. There is hope after a breakup, you just have to believe it and go discover it.

So stop reading already, get up, and do something!

S.c Rhyne

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Virgo On The Horizon

Its my birthday!

As I get older and a tad bit wiser today, I can look back at all the things that have happened, all that I have now, and all that I can stand to gain in the future — and you know what? Its not half-bad!

Yep! I still have my health, a roof over my head, and a working metro card and a car to get me where I need to be, all with -163 bucks in the bank.

But hey, I’m still pretty lucky.

Hell, I’m luckier than most of the people I know, which tells me that I’m either really blessed, or that I need to stop hanging out with those less fortunate than me.

Anyway…..

I took a look at my horoscope tonight (I am a classic Virgo! and a Tiger too!) and while Venus is in residence this month, which will lead to lots of fun, self-love pampering, but consequence of a slight diva-like behavior things are looking up, ideas are being born, motivation is starting to rev-up again, and confidence has moved up a notch or three.

I’m thinking about where I want to be by the end of 2014, and what moves I want to make (literal and figurative) and having more faith that I can overcome challenges, and soon I will be ready to try a very big challenge in a few short months.

So Virgos! Do you have (had) a birthday this month? What are plans, fears, challenges, and goals ahead?

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5 Remarkable Date Ideas for Couples in (or Approaching) a Rut

If you are part of a couple, you know how important it is to keep the relationship alive. And the longer you’re in a relationship, the harder you have to work to keep an element of excitement in it. The best way to do that? A great date. Not the, “You wanna go the movies?” date–we’re talking about a unique adventure date you’ll never forget. Here, then, are five exceptional date ideas:

Rent a Convertible and Take a Mini Road Trip

Choose a destination and activity (i.e., eat at a restaurant in a nearby town, go to a remote area and have a picnic) and then rent a convertible for the day. Make sure the destination is far enough away that it gives you a chance to talk. Don’t forget rental car insurance before booking that convertible, it’s cheaper than getting it at the counter. And of course, make sure the weather forecast is in your favor.

Book a Couples Massage as Part of a Spa Package

Even really macho guys enjoy a good massage, and getting one together is a bonding and relaxing experience. Get a spa package that includes amenities like champagne and rose petals. Some spas include a treatment prior to the massage, such as a soak in a hydrotherapy tub.

It’s a time to play, before relaxing on the table!

Take a Surprise Trip to Las Vegas

Surprise your other half with a trip to Las Vegas. You can always find discount flights to Vegas, and you’re guaranteed to have a blast. Just make sure you take enough money. And if you’re lucky, you’ll also make enough there too!

Head to the Drive-In

Drive-ins are making a comeback. Take some fold-up patio chairs (if you want to sit in front of your car) or some blankets (in case you want to be, um, more intimate inside the car or in the back of your truck). You can also bring popcorn, soda and a cooler, if you don’t want to spend the money on stuff to eat.

Take a Midnight Cruise

It doesn’t have to be at midnight, by the way. You can always take a sunset cruise, as well. Google “midnight cruise” or whatever kind you want and your city. Some cruises have live music and dancing; often the ships have two to three decks, and the top one is for you and the moon. Don’t forget to make a reservation, too, as these types of boat cruises tend to get full quickly. You can also read about my experience on one of these cruises!

Make It a Habit

Every couple gets caught up in their own routine. Somehow, we forget that we need time together as a couple. Consider scheduling a regular “doesn’t get canceled no matter what” date i.e., once a week or once a month. There are plenty of dates you can go on and have a good time; try to go on ones where you will have an incredible time. More importantly, make sure you don’t forget to go on dates at all.

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Starting From Scratch

Hello World!

This summer had been unremarkable to say the least, well unremarkable at home; around the world the streets are still colored in blood and justice.

But nonetheless, the last few weeks I’ve been thinking about making a real effort to start over. See, in the last year — I’ve lost a lot, from a relationship to weight to a career; and I made headway in some departments, but I still feel bogged down in my new environment.

It probably has something to do with the fact that both the reporter and I were thinking the same thing for 2014, and decided to get new jobs in the same field.

wtf stamp, what the fuck, what the hell, the reporter and the girl,

Courtesy of speakgeekytome.com

Hhhmmmm…Well that was surprising to say the least.

Anyways, new job, new bullshit, new goals; but really hard to argue that I’m making a fresh start when I bump into the same old faces or have to deal with same bullshit at work.

It’s like running in place.

Now I’d really like to change jobs, and even move somewhere…far. Like Europe.

Thus, I’m hoping some of my European readers can help me out and point me where to look. I’ve been wanting to visit for a long time, but I think the idea of moving and starting over there is plausible.

Like the yummy chocolate cake that I made last night, I like to do things from scratch. When I first saw “Jon” a few months ago, I didn’t say a word to him, and neither did he to me. Despite the fact that we were forced to sit next together during a public presentation (so obviously it would have been rude to kick him in the balls in front of a hundred people).

My friend says it was cold-hearted, but I’m hardcore when it comes to erasing the past and the ills it brought me. Even if it  means moving or running.

Listen, I’m sick and tired of taking the train and looking up at his old station where we used to meet up. I don’t even think I’ve been down to that part of Brooklyn in over a year.

So is it better to start from scratch? Or should I just scrape the charred pieces off and eat my cake?

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Recipe!

This is a dense and gooey chocolate cake. Very is to make and its gluten free (no flour!)

1 ounce semisweet chocolate, chopped          1/2 cup cocoa powder
1/2 cup butter                                                  3 eggs, beaten
3/4 cup sugar                                                  1 teaspoon vanilla extract

I played around with the ingredients, taking away an egg, and adding a little more chocolate and less sugar. The result was a soft cake but with a stronger chocolate taste, almost to the point of having a slightly bitter aftertaste. This was fine as I paired it with salted buttercream frosting and coconut ice cream!

  1. Preheat oven to 300 degrees F (150 degrees C). Grease a cake pan, and dust with a little cocoa powder.
  2.  Melt chocolate and butter. Remove from heat, and stir in sugar, cocoa powder, eggs, and vanilla. Pour into prepared pan.
  3. Bake in preheated oven for 30 minutes. Let cool in pan for 10 minutes, then turn out onto a wire rack and cool completely. Slices can also be reheated for 20 to 30 seconds in the microwave before serving.

Salted Buttercream Frosting

1 cup confectioner’s (powdered) sugar                          2 tablespoons milk or cream

1/2 cup butter (salted variety)                                        1/2 teaspoon coarse sea salt

1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

1. Mix together sugar and butter. Mix on slowly until well blended and then increase speed to beat for another 3 minutes.

2. Add vanilla and cream or milk and continue to whisk for s few minutes until you reach the desired consistency. You can add more cream or milk if needed.

3. Sprinkle with sea salt after spreading over cake.

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Top 4 American Cities for Starting Over

Life is a journey, and for many of us our journey takes us to new and vibrant places for a handful of reasons across the span of our lifetime such as landing a dream job, starting a family, or moving on to the next chapter in life. For those who are looking for a fresh place to hang their hats, the following four American cities are wonderful places to start over.

Anchorage, Alaska

From its awe-inspiring scenic beauty and relatively low unemployment rate to its strong local economy, Anchorage is a top city to live and work. For people looking to elevate their careers, consider that over a quarter of the companies in Anchorage are planning on hiring new workers, with job prospects in the financial, construction, education, leisure and health service industries being especially strong, according to MSN. Job seekers who are looking for a new career and a promising job market are sure to do well with a move way up north. Forget the all-work no-play mentality—Anchorage is a great for location for outdoor enthusiasts to play—hiking, biking, kayaking, skiing, and other outdoor adventures wait outside of your door each day if you move to this city.

I lived in Anchorage for a short period and have thought about going back to get away from things.

Johnson City, Tennessee

For people who have had enough of sky-high rents and astronomical grocery bills, The Volunteer State offers a very low cost of living. Tennessee has no income tax and is second to only Oklahoma for its budget-friendly living expenses, according to Business Insider. Known as Tennessee’s Green City, Johnson City has earned top honors, receiving the state’s first Green City Leadership award for its environmental efforts. Eco-conscious folks who relocate to Tennessee will find that the rent or mortgage on their new home is so reasonable, they will have plenty of wiggle room in the budget for home improvement projects, such as adding green features like energy efficient windows, new roofing, and custom doors to their new abode.

Phoenix, Arizona

Although the capital of Arizona was hit especially hard during the recent recession, the city is bouncing back to be better than ever. Many homes are now available at extremely reasonable prices and people ages 20-29 are flocking to this city. Phoenix is also home to a number of major corporations, including Intel, PetSmart, Motorola, and top employers include Bank of America and Wal-Mart. Granted, Phoenix gets pretty toasty in the summer with temperatures that easily top 110 degrees on some days, but as former Northeasterners who now call Phoenix home like to say, “You don’t have to shovel sunshine.” The weather is gorgeous for the majority of the year, the employment outlook is positive, and there’s a plethora of fantastic restaurants and a rich culture—all of these things help make Phoenix a great place for young people to reinvent themselves.

Bethesda, Maryland

Moms and dads who hold education in high regard and wouldn’t mind switching careers should consider Bethesda, Maryland. The area has an exceptionally low unemployment rate of around 5 percent, which is over 2 points lower than the national average, according to Forbes. In addition, the housing market is very strong, and the state is listed as number one in the entire country for its school systems. Boasting a great quality of life, Bethesda often appears on on lists ranking the livability of top cities, making this town an excellent place to live.