Looking Foward

Hello World,

In less than a few hours New York City will welcome a new year, which will bring new uncertainties, experiences, joy, sorrow, heartache, and growth.

My New Years Resolution has always been pretty generic, but this year I want to take a chance to appreciate my loved ones and myself a little bit more. I don’t mean just doing nice things for myself and other people, but really taking the time recognize talent, hard-work, and compassion in other people and myself.

And appreciate all the good things and people I know, that bring some of those traits to my life.

Eh, 2012 ain’t so bad when you think about all that you have and all that you could have lost.

Bonne Annee!

NYE

Does Your Partner Really Know You? 5 Ways to Find Out

TheGirl:

Lol I really like the pic!

Originally posted on African American Matchmaking ™:

You Dont Even Know Me

We spend time and intimate space with our boyfriends and girlfriends, but how well do they know us, really?  Five ways to tell is your partner really knows you:

  1. Whether it costs a lot or a little, s/he knows the perfect gift to give you at any given time, holidays and non-holidays.
  2. Even though they wait patiently for you to finish, s/he could finish your sentences for you.
  3. S/he can order food at any restaurant at home or in any foreign country and you would enjoy it.
  4. S/he knows what kind of books you read and movies you like to watch.
  5. They know the secret things you do when you are home alone, just being you, and they do not judge.

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Interracial Relationship Advice: My boyfriend won’t let me visit him at home

TheGirl:

One of the top issues plaguing IRs

Originally posted on KolorBlind Mag:

Credit: SYM

Hi,

I’m a Senior in High School and graduate next summer. My white boyfriend (I’m black), who I’ve been dating for 7 months, has never invited me over to his house.

I’ve invited him over to mine a few times and he’s been at my house. Every time I ask him why I can’t visit him at home, he gives me a lame excuse. Do you think he has someone else? Could he be cheating? Or do you think he’s ashamed of me? I don’t know what to think anymore. 

Hi there,

What you just described sounds very fishy. I am guessing he hasn’t told his parents he’s dating a black girl. It’s not as if he could be married and is hiding you from his wife.

It doesn’t sound like you want to break up with him, however, things may not change much if he’s afraid of…

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Chapter 11: Still NOT Meshing

“Is that why you asked me to come over?” I demanded, swinging my legs to the other side of the bed as I stood up.

I looked at him for an answer, but his eyes glazed over from the smoke of his bong, seemed clueless at the situation unfolding before him.

And in retrospect, I do feel a little sorry for the guy; I forgot how socially awkward he is, and how maybe his “playfulness” went down smoother in his mind.

“Jon…is this all you want me for…?” I asked, probably a little more shocked, then angry.

“What…what are you talking about?” He giggled out.

I faced him on the bed, then I stood up and fished around for my belongings.

“I should get going” I mumbled….loudly

“Are you leaving already?” He asked, I know he wasn’t laughing or smiling because he was happy, but…maybe….is this time? Maybe I can talk some sense into him?

I stared at him from across the room, as his red eyes glazed back at me.

“Hey you know…” As I stepped forward, with my shoulders relaxed and voice softened. I sat next to him on the bed and gently placed my hand on his warm stomach.

“I have work tomorrow…..and you didn’t say I could bring my stuff…” I began to explain, I didn’t want to look like a monster, walking out on —-

“Well, I was testing you!….” He exclaimed.

WTF! Testing me? What kind of test is that? What is the point, of not giving me an answer about sleeping over, if you wanted me to?

“Jon what the hell? Testing me? Why for….do you think that’s right? I really really like you! It hurts” I yelled back.

“Well then you should have….” He continued, I was staring at him but had tuned him out. Testing me?

“Hey look, are you meeting new people?” I asked, while playfully caressing his stomach.

“No.” He answered.

Good

“Oh, how come?” I blinked.

“Well I have a hard time approaching women…starting conversation” He explained.

I know he doesn’t like the bar scene, or just about any scene….but I wanted to make sure that he was….really really available.

“Well you know, I’m having a hard time meeting new people too, in fact I don’t want to meet new people cause all I think about is you.” I said. It was honest and straightforward.

“What! But you wanted an open relationship!” He said, still smiling though.

“I remember what I said, but that was before….(Like chapter 5 before) this is now. I have developed feelings for you, deep feelings.” I’m practically serenading this now.

“Why do you want to be with me now?” He asked.

“Hhhmmmm…well I think it’s a practical solution for two people that like each other and are seeing each other to get together…” I answered. I felt a little stupid answering this, isn’t it obvious?

He likes me.

I like him.

He declared his affection for me.

I’m declaring my affection for him.

Let’s date. 1+1=2. You’re a smart boy, do the math. Bitch.

“That’s not a good enough reason for me to be with you.” He said, “You don’t even like being with me…”

Now he’s kicking his legs around and shaking his head like a 5 year old that was just told to brush his teeth.

“Ya! How could you say that? I do like being with you, I call you, text you, pick up the tab, slept with you before…how could you not see that I like you? Cause I don’t smile or do PDA? You have to understand that with Caribbean men…I’m not use to all the physical affection….but that doesn’t mean I hate it! Or that I don’t like you!” I’m screaming…why aren’t my words getting through his cloudy head?

“Well then why don’t you date a Caribbean guy then?” He screamed back.

Sigh. Why don’t I?

“Goodnight Jon” As I walked out of his apartment,

“Goodnight” he said as he turned in his bed….to…I don’t know.

“Call me tomorrow”

“Sure, I’ll call. Just make sure you remember to turn your phone on” He retorted.

Ouch!

 *****

Ok…Ok so maybe I didn’t forget to turn on my phone. But who the fuck cares? I didn’t know he’d call. I really didn’t.

In fact, I am really surprise that not only did he call, but he wanted me to come over…..but it’s a lie!!!

He doesn’t care, and I know he doesn’t. We’re probably going to break up, and I need this to end because it is just killing me.

When I wake up all I think about is him, before I go to sleep I wonder if he’s asleep too. Every time something comes up, I wonder “What Would Jon Do, or think about this?” I do everything but dream about him.

I can’t eat, I can’t think apart from Jon. I’m sick. This is a sickness, it’s not healthy. I could feel my life bleeding out of me.

I need to hold things together. Maybe, I’m not doing what I can to really show my feelings. But how do I know he has them for me? I gotta make him talk to me…..how?

I just need to know before I go further. I feel so….“uncertain” would be putting it lightly. I was vulnerable, like –at his mercy—vulnerable. You know, like when someone puts a gun to your head and its completely up to them if you live or die.

Yes, that kind of vulnerable.

And I needed to know my odds of survival, I had to calculate the possibility of me getting through this alive. With or without Jon.

I must think about survival not love.

I need to know…if you feel the same way. If you want me like I want you.

Cause if not, then I have to prepare…starting now. For survival.

Would you know, that I’d be the one placing the gun in his hand?

Chapter 12: Hey, let’s go on a (speed) date!!

“Yeh, that sounds like fun…let’s do it! We can both go and get numbers to m–”

“Jon, I don’t want to go speed dating!!!” I cried

© 2012 -2013 S. C Rhyne

Chapter 11 will post on Sunday

Hello,

 

Happy Holiday weekend!!! Chapter 11 of TheReporterandTheGirl series will post tomorrow, Sunday December 23, 2012. Glad you all survived the apocalypse, and this will be our last post for the holiday week. and we’ll pick up January 4th.

 

Have a merry weekend!!