From Relationship Rules
Advice, lifestyle, and plain ole rants!
You’re not alone, 102 million people were unmarried in 2011, according to the United States Census. This group also made up 44.1 percent of all U.S. residents who were ages 18 and older. Further, the dating industry revenue topples $2 billion a year with an annual growth rate of 4.8 percent. Regardless of if you’re married, single or currently dating, everyone can benefit from some fresh ideas it comes to finding the perfect date. Here’s a list of fun ideas to put the romance back in your relationship or impress someone on your first date.
Get out of your usual rut of dinner and a movie and do something truly unique. A brewery tour can take you behind the scenes of your favorite brew and gives the opportunity to sample. Most breweries will also give a few beers for free or at a discounted price so you can keep the fun going. If you’re not sure what to talk about after the tour, brainstorm your own beer ideas until your date turns into a fun adventure on setting up your own brewery with a ridiculous name. I’ll sample a Date Draft whenever you’ve got the first batch ready for sale.
Go on a motorcycle ride through the country, city or the open highway. There’s no destination better than wherever the road takes you. But to really get into the biker spirit, shop for motorcycle jackets and accessories together to ride on your adventure out. Then come up with your own biker names and take on the persona of a young couple out for trouble—or maybe just to clean up trouble.
Refuel your relationship’s chemistry with a volunteer date. Working together for a common cause from packing up supplies for a food pantry to taking care of animals can help form bonds in your relationship. Pick an activity lasting from a few hours to an entire day and talk about how volunteering impacts your life. You might get a fresh perspective on your date you wouldn’t have seen before.
Cuddle up under the stars for a romantic date night. If you’re in a private space like your backyard, bring along a bottle of wine and snacks for an evening picnic. Don’t forget to look at museums for stargazing events.
It’s easy to forget all the fun events and attractions in your own hometown or nearby city. Plan out a fun day of amusement parks, museums, festivals or the zoo for a staycation date. Look at your attractions’ calendar of events. Your zoo might host a jazz night, or the museum might offer a cocktail evening with a guest speaker. You’ll impress your date by your ingenuity and desire to find the very best in your own community.
Head to an international food store and stock up on cultured foods to match your foreign film of choice. Cook a meal together with your date and then cuddle up together for the main event. Opt for a flick without subtitles and try to guess what’s happening and improvise the dialogue. You’ll have a great time laughing at each other’s guesses and will still have time to chat without getting too distracted by the film.
Its an ice cream date! Check out the coconut ice cream recipe I used here.
Back in the day, a man would wait three days after a date to call. Few people have the time or patience for that in 2014. In fact, a Match.com survey found that more than 50 percent of women now follow up first. Not only have certain gender roles changed, but technology also has changed how we communicate in the dating world.
So, if you recently had a first date that went well, reaching out in the right way is the best possible chance at a second. Here are three ideas on how to do exactly that:
You talked for hours, either about a variety of topics or your shared passions. You can show that you were truly listening by sharing a relevant story or video to help get that second date.
Did you talk about your love of food? Send a review of a favorite restaurant—preferably one that your date has never eaten at—and suggest going there. Do you both enjoy scary movies? Send the trailer to an upcoming release on your must-see list. Not only do sharing these links remind him or her of your connection, they also give you an opening to ask for a follow-up outing.
Age often contributes to how a person communicates after a date, states the Match.com survey. Calling remains the preferred method for all ages and is followed by texting, emailing and instant messaging, respectively for those ages 21 to 34. Those in the 35 to 44 range agreed with the younger group about calling and instant messaging but ranked emailing over texting.
No matter your age, keep the other person’s expectations in mind. If it took a phone call to secure the date, follow up with the same medium to show consistency in your level of interest. Or, if you want to show that you really enjoyed the outing, go above and beyond the norm. If you typically communicate electronically, pick up the phone. As eHarmony points out, moving from characters to a voice can show your charming side.
Do not underestimate the power of flowers and a thoughtful card. The gesture not only thanks the person for their time and attention but it shows that you are interested in a second date. When choosing which flowers to send, keep their meanings in mind.
For examples, roses send a romantic message. Choose lilac and purple roses if you hit it off immediately, as they represent enchantment. Orange conveys enthusiasm and desire. Red serves as the symbol of romantic love and enduring passion, which may not be appropriate so early in a relationship. You also can send a favorite flower if you were able to find out what it is during your date.
As for how soon you should follow up, don’t waste time and don’t play games. Reach out the following day and include a suggestion for a second date. If you play coy, your romantic interest may move on.
Breakups are hard to overcome, and moving on can feel nearly impossible. You may want to just stay in bed and eat, but the best way to move on from a breakup is to get up, get out and get active. Refocus your mind away from the emotional pain and start moving your life forward. The three things to remember: be social, be active, be open to possibilities. Here are a few tips in these areas:
Surround yourself with friends and family, and make an effort to meet new people. Visit websites like Meetup.com to find clubs for like-minded people who get out socialize. Groups range from knitting circles, sports teams, hiking groups, motorcycle clubs and independent filmmaker workshops.
Social interaction is healthy and will help you stop thinking about your miserable ex. By joining new groups, you might even pick up an unexpected hobby and find new ways to express yourself:
Another outlet for those sorrowful feelings is exercise. Go for a hike or a run. Get out your aggression through cardio, boxing or weightlifting. Try Pilates, yoga or Zumba. The endorphins produced through physical activity can alleviate those sad, yucky feelings and get you to see things in a more positive light. Endorphins also help by improving self-esteem and positivity and reducing your perception of pain. So get up off the couch and go for a run—it will even be a sweet bonus if you happen to run into your ex and have the chance to show off your newly fit body!
Go out dancing. Get some friends together and take a beginners dance class. Chose from tap, swing, hip hop, ballet, or ballroom—the style doesn’t matter. What’s important is that you’re getting out, taking part in an upbeat activity and getting those endorphins flowing.
Even a night out dancing at a club can be a great time among friends. And remember: Don’t take yourself too seriously. If you dance goofy then dance goofy. Laughing and smiling will help you feel better.
Always be open-minded about new possibilities. Go to a museum. Attend a local food or culture festival. Listen to live music in your local area. Ever tried boating? Boating is a fun activity that gets you outdoors, and with the wind blowing through your hair, you’ll feel your troubles melt away. If you have never done it before, now is a great time to learn. Research the best boating spots in your area and go online to obtain your boating license if necessary.
Take advantage of the different seasons and choose activities that pique your interest. From sight-seeing right in your own backyard or learning something new, to hiking, dancing, boating and running—these are the healthful activities that will have you on your way to emotional healing in no time.
The key to moving on after breakups is staying active. While it may seem impossible to crawl out of bed, you will be happier when you do. Remember to try new things and to be social. There is hope after a breakup, you just have to believe it and go discover it.
So stop reading already, get up, and do something!
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Its my birthday!
As I get older and a tad bit wiser today, I can look back at all the things that have happened, all that I have now, and all that I can stand to gain in the future — and you know what? Its not half-bad!
Yep! I still have my health, a roof over my head, and a working metro card and a car to get me where I need to be, all with -163 bucks in the bank.
But hey, I’m still pretty lucky.
Hell, I’m luckier than most of the people I know, which tells me that I’m either really blessed, or that I need to stop hanging out with those less fortunate than me.
I took a look at my horoscope tonight (I am a classic Virgo! and a Tiger too!) and while Venus is in residence this month, which will lead to lots of fun, self-love pampering, but consequence of a slight diva-like behavior things are looking up, ideas are being born, motivation is starting to rev-up again, and confidence has moved up a notch or three.
I’m thinking about where I want to be by the end of 2014, and what moves I want to make (literal and figurative) and having more faith that I can overcome challenges, and soon I will be ready to try a very big challenge in a few short months.
So Virgos! Do you have (had) a birthday this month? What are plans, fears, challenges, and goals ahead?
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If you are part of a couple, you know how important it is to keep the relationship alive. And the longer you’re in a relationship, the harder you have to work to keep an element of excitement in it. The best way to do that? A great date. Not the, “You wanna go the movies?” date–we’re talking about a unique adventure date you’ll never forget. Here, then, are five exceptional date ideas:
Choose a destination and activity (i.e., eat at a restaurant in a nearby town, go to a remote area and have a picnic) and then rent a convertible for the day. Make sure the destination is far enough away that it gives you a chance to talk. Don’t forget rental car insurance before booking that convertible, it’s cheaper than getting it at the counter. And of course, make sure the weather forecast is in your favor.
Even really macho guys enjoy a good massage, and getting one together is a bonding and relaxing experience. Get a spa package that includes amenities like champagne and rose petals. Some spas include a treatment prior to the massage, such as a soak in a hydrotherapy tub.
It’s a time to play, before relaxing on the table!
Surprise your other half with a trip to Las Vegas. You can always find discount flights to Vegas, and you’re guaranteed to have a blast. Just make sure you take enough money. And if you’re lucky, you’ll also make enough there too!
Drive-ins are making a comeback. Take some fold-up patio chairs (if you want to sit in front of your car) or some blankets (in case you want to be, um, more intimate inside the car or in the back of your truck). You can also bring popcorn, soda and a cooler, if you don’t want to spend the money on stuff to eat.
It doesn’t have to be at midnight, by the way. You can always take a sunset cruise, as well. Google “midnight cruise” or whatever kind you want and your city. Some cruises have live music and dancing; often the ships have two to three decks, and the top one is for you and the moon. Don’t forget to make a reservation, too, as these types of boat cruises tend to get full quickly. You can also read about my experience on one of these cruises!
Every couple gets caught up in their own routine. Somehow, we forget that we need time together as a couple. Consider scheduling a regular “doesn’t get canceled no matter what” date i.e., once a week or once a month. There are plenty of dates you can go on and have a good time; try to go on ones where you will have an incredible time. More importantly, make sure you don’t forget to go on dates at all.