la bare, joe manganiello, male stripper, shocked woman, ScRhyne, interview

Joe Manganiello’s La Bare, Reveals All

So I had an interview with some cast members of Joe Manganiello‘s new documentary La Bare.

These guys left nothing to my imagination as they talked about the life and culture of being a dancer at a very popular male strip club in Dallas.

BackGround:

La Bare is the most popular male strip located in Dallas, Texas and has been entertaining ladies from all over the world for decades. I sat down with Channing, Cesar, and J.D – three real life entertainers who work at La Bare and star in this documentary.

I started off asking Channing, who is the youngest of the three, his experiences becoming an exotic dancer and what a rookie can expect when they enter the business.

It’s more than just women, money, and a good time, like the famous line from Magic Mike; these men train and diet like professional athletes, promote themselves like entrepreneurs with business cards and clientele list, hours of choreographed training– and they don’t take kind to newbies who think they can get by with doing the running man on stage.

“First thing you have to do, is go to the gym and stay quiet at first so the veterans don’t give you shit. Don’t bum rush it,…watch the veterans until you find your ground.”

Cesar chimes in, “it’s [strip clubs] a pretty open field, if you have a decent body…and you’re brave enough to get on the stage every night. The fact is, our doors are always open.”

And anyone can test their bravery on amateur night, which is described by the guys as its own animal where everyone from bad bet pickers to Chippendale hopefuls sign up for a chance to prove themselves. Many, like Channing and Cesar started out as servers, before taking a chance on a Thursday night in front of 30 or so women and co workers!

Channing, also known as the shirtless wonder, had a nice awkward experience that rivaled his high school musical days, (no duh?) and Cesar was just glad he hit all the beats on stage.

stripper, male butt, money in g-string

Courtesy of La Bare Film

So what is the real difference with female dancers and male dancers? I asked J.D, since he commented in the film that women with big titties and decent looks could easily get a job as dancer.

“It has to do with the clientele, there’s no comparison– everything is different except both are wearing underwear.”

The truth is that La Bare dancers do more than just dance. They interact with their audience, sometimes taking women on stage to be part of show and that takes a lot of confidence. Confidence that takes experience and motivation to find.

la bare, strip club, male stripper, prformance SCRhyne

Courtesy of La Bare Film – Cesar playing “doctor”

They are not just pole dancers– not that anything’s wrong with that.

“…I’ve taken a pole dancing class, its nothing to downplay.”– Cesar.

This kind of lifestyle seems like a whirlwind fantasy, but really what you may not know about the men of La Bare, is that they have families. They are fathers, sons, and maybe even grandfathers who go through the same 9 to 5 reality you go through.

Even the strongest of them, is still as frail as the next human.

“So how do you find that boundary between ‘fantasy’ and ‘reality’?” I ask.

Cesar- “Because of the nature of the business and flirtation, its very difficult to have blended relationship in the clubs. It can be difficult because people want more of your time and attention and its kind of difficult keeping your balance in those regards.”

bachlorette party, male strippers, cowboys, S.cRhyne La Bare, Channing, J.D

Courtesy of La Bare Film

So what’s next?

J.D – “Supposedly a TV Show on the way, it’s highly possible.”

Fans, go to theaters Friday June 27, 2014 to watch La Bare. I’ll be visiting the club that night! ;-)

Meet the guys from La Bare on their Facebook pages!

Channing

Cesar

J.D

A Proper Lady

I spent this weekend going through old crap and memories, until I found a book that I had not seen in years, it was an etiquette guide book, that was given to me when I went to a modeling school here in the city.

Now that I think about it, it was more of a finishing school.
finishing school, the reporter and the girl, S.C Rhyne, interracial blog, barbizon, modeling
The booked talked about etiquette over the phone, dinner parties, and other social interactions.

Thus, part of me began to wonder when did I stray from the path of becoming a proper young woman?

Somewhere in the last 15 years or so; I stopped playing piano and abandoned any aspirations of continuing a professional path with it, I started biting my nails and skin to the point of Dermatillomania, and this guy has a better posture than me:
hunchback, etiquette, the reporter and the girl, ScRhyne
The idea of course, of being a proper young lady, is that you are more desirable and attractive to the eligible bachelor.
loser, dating a loser, the reporter and the girl, interracial blogger, ScRhyne
No, not him. This guy:
eligible bachelor, dating, the reporter and the girl
A few years ago I liked this guy in my swim class, and I finally brought my best friend to…”check him out” and she gave her approval of him.

I remember at the end of class  after running a pretty good drill, I got on deck and gave him a “high 5″. Afterwards, my friend suggested that since I liked him, I should not have high-5’ed him as it was not lady-like.

Apparently, with D cups, shoulder-length hair, and hips to knock J-Lo of the deck, he’d associate me as “one of the guys”.

I did give him my number, and after that never saw him again.

Well, its never too late to improve yourself; from sitting up straighter to changing your wardrobe. But it was last night at a gala, when I realized why many women do not act like proper ladies, it’s because of… the men!

Duh-duh-duh

A colleague invited me to this formal event, where I was lead to my seat and he pulled it out for me. He offered to get my drink, and women and guests were served dinner first. Thus, it was a code of conduct that the men be gentlemen and serving to their lady partners.

I sure felt like a noble lady as even my table manners dramatically improved from:
poor table manners, bad etiquette, black woman eating, the reporter and the girl
to:
pride and prejudice, formal dining, table etiquette, relationships, the reporter and the girl
It sometimes takes a small show of courtesy or respect to boost one’s esteem and consciousness. And to receive the same treatment in kind.

And whom you are with makes a difference; people treat you based on how your friend/partner treats you.

Whether its holding your coat or pulling our your chair — a waiter will show you an ounce more of respect when they see your partner doing the same thing — it screams: “She’s important!”

And it changes how you see yourself, and the expectations you have for yourself.

For now, I’ll read through that book, maybe there are some things I need to re-learn, and should come to expect for myself.

So, does your beau treat you like a proper lady?

The Power of Rejection

I have rejected a number of guys in my short lifetime.

From all those “Drive-by Hollas”

hollering from a car, picking up girls, shenanigans

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’d sometimes Hollaback.

gwen stefani. hollaback, hollering from a car, pick ups

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

But that’s as far I would take it. Just say “hi” and keep it moving.

Used to be a time, when I’d go to the club and there was always a guy or three wanting to dance:

dancing guy, old white guy, funny guy

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And maybe buy me a drink:

And then eventually ask if I ‘d like to…have some sweet stuff:

skittles, condom, sex, love-making, funny condoms

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

But a few Fridays ago, I finally decided to come out of the cave and soothe my primal needs. I had been distracting myself with other activities, until I felt that I was ready to be “out there”. Last June, my male friend tried, unsuccessfully, to hook me up during a fun night out. But I felt it too soon and the handsome man was too married.

But now its been about…18 months, but whose counting? So I thought I might give it a stab. I have even been lurking around my old online profile;  but I don’t think I want to go back to the site again.

So nonetheless, my wingman takes me out to several bars in Manhattan along the Upper Westside. With some liquid courage, I was able to start some pretty good conversations and even shamelessly touch and caress the targets’ arm to signal that I’m ready.

Turns out, no one was ready.

I was rejected about three times that night, ( I think twice from the same person).

The last guy I ended up having a great conversation with…I think. Well, I remember the most about him. Including the fact that he just broke up with his girlfriend earlier in the week.

Boy can I pick ‘em?

So I spent the latter part of the night, encouraging him to “talk about it” and trying to console him because I think he was gonna cry, or maybe just really annoyed with me.

I’m not sure when I got home or how.

drunk girl, falling down drunk, intoxicated
But I did, and some days latter, I had to admire my shit-tastic luck.

I am now in the category of women that are educated, self-supporting, a few years shy of 30, and single. The likelihood that I would get married by 30, and biological clock nonsense, doesn’t apply to me anymore.

I mean let’s face it, if I can’t drunk guy in a dive bar at something o’clock to go home with, then what are the chances of having a real relationship?

An old acquaintance of mine, has been seeing this douche, dude, for like 6 or 7 years off and on. He constantly tells her he wants a future with her and blah blah…but then they break up. Usually because he does some dumb shit, and then they do their own thing for awhile and circle back to each other through hooking up…blah blah blah.

That’s not a real relationship, and who would want that drama of being “the sure thing.” You know the girl that waits patiently for her man to finish sewing his wild oats.

For a time I hoped for a reconnection with the reporter, but I realize now that I’ve gone through a metamorphosis and realized that I’m not the average woman who would follow the same plain Jane path.

I’m in a category all my own that can be defined by my standards. And not centered around someone else.

We’ve all been rejected, including my acquaintance who has been rejected multiple times by the same person. You’d think she take the hint….but nonetheless, it took a hard rejection for me to understand what it means to live.

So I’ll  go out again in another few weeks, and this time focus more on living and having a good time, than chasing tail.

Living Single:

sex and the city, living single, girls night out,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Follow on Twitter: @ReporterandGirl and Facebook.

Guest Contribution: 5 Dates to Change Your FB Status

The first five dates are the most impressionable in anyone’s dating life. If you’re a guy in hot pursuit of your dream girl, listen up. Start off on the right foot (rather than that said foot in your mouth) from date one. Saddle up for love with these six manly fashion fundamentals.

Pre-first Date — Seal the Deal

If you want to impress a quality girl, confidence is key. No matter your objective, whether you want to take a girl home or to Taco Bell, you must be a confident dude with a nothing-to-lose attitude. The single girl is already on the defense before even knowing your name. She looks for one reason to give a guy a chance, and it’s (real) confidence that will put a crack in her wall of dating fortification.

You know who you are and feel comfortable with the guy staring back at you in the mirror. Tread gently though, and don’t mistake arrogance for confidence. Narcissism or egotism will quickly end your pursuit.

Date 1 — Dinner & Drinks

Taking a girl to dinner may be cliché, but custom romantic traditions still make her swoon (or more honestly, meet an expectation). Plan to pay on the first date. Chivalry is not dead.

Truthfully, everything you say or do will be judged, so jump into the trenches with a simple outfit to help mitigate messy first-date warfare. The look of understated sexiness? A well-fitted pair of 7 For All Mankind denim jeans and a clean, casual T-shirt paired with a luxury watch, such as Nixon or the higher-end Bulgari. A sexy and confident single man who isn’t afraid of rejection invests in a good watch. A watch is the one piece of men’s jewelry that punctuates his style. Plus, you’re a man who prefers to tell time with an artful clock face rather than a glaring iPhone screen.

Date 2 — The Outdoors Test

Most men like a versatile woman. She’s just as hot in workout shoes on a mountain trail as she is in heels at the club. Date three will crush a couple barriers and determine if the girl knows how to break a sweat. Going for a hike or riding bikes reveals her adventurous and athletic side. And just as much as she may love her Lululemon yoga pants, you’re loyal to your active shades as well.

Sure, you’re a man who likes his options. If you admittedly have an entire collection of aftermarket replacement lenses for your Oakleys, save the rainbow polarized lenses for the next Vegas bachelor party. Rock the classic titanium or black-colored lenses, and you can both focus on your rad workout together, because remember, couples who work out together—stay together, forever.

Date 3 — Home Visit

Is this love? Could be. But first it’s time to plan for the third date—the highly anticipated overnighter. Invite her over for the evening and turn up the heat by cooking her a thoughtfully planned meal. The theme of the date is the seduction of aroma.

Along with the delicious scents of juicy pork tenderloin, sautéed zucchini and Pinot Noir, enhance the romantic evening with an even more arousing fragrance (you). Dior Homme Cologne won the 2014 GQ Grooming Awards, and for a rugged manly man on a quest to become the next Dan Bilzerian (Instagram’s most notorious playboy), Penhaligon’s Sartorial Beard Oil will render your girl weak in the knees and with luck, head over heels.

Date 4 — Bro Introduction

Before entering relationship territory, you’re gonna need approval. Bro approval. Plan a nightly summertime backyard barbecue outfitted with the works—chicken, ribs, sweet potatoes and brew. It’s the alcohol-infused congregation of your friends and hers. This party may as well be the mixer of your 30s, reminiscent of college fratty days.

And as the grill master on the verge of a serious boyfriend status, don’t be afraid to be more fashionably frivolous. Ditch the Vans or flip-flops for stylish suede shoes in olive green or rusty orange. Chubbies shorts in pastel and a tucked-in denim chambray will transform a pair of Johnston & Murphy suede shoes into a statement.

Date 5 — Facebook Official

Like it was possible for your friends not to like her. Now that you’ve got bro approval, turn this amour into a real relationship. Asking her to be your girlfriend doesn’t have to be formal affair; no one’s proposing here. It should, however, be more meaningful than a text or public use of a label neither of your discussed.

Make it Facebook official and initiate a sincere conversation while just hanging out in your lounge-wear. If you want to look even more endearing, throw on your favorite hat. The boyishness of a man in a sporty hat makes a girl swoon like heart-eyes emoji. She’s now yours. It’s official. Facebook official.

crazy ad, dating ads, desperate, dating in NYC

Guest Contribution: The Science of Dating

The Internet is a great place to find dating advice. Unfortunately, most of it comes from those who have simply dated a lot. If you are reading this and want to get to a second date, then you do not want to date often. You want to date well. You want to do it right and maybe meet that special someone. The best place to look for dating instruction is in a lab. Science has done more good for romance than any online feedback ever will.

The Science of Attraction

Mate selection is strongly ingrained in our genetics, coming from the caveman days and persisting today. The reasons for attraction are multidimensional with influences from perceived masculinity, intelligence and facial symmetry. A British study showed the men who self-focus on muscle size are more oppressive to women and that women know this at some level. The takeaway from this study is that having a chiseled body may get you a second look but might not get you the second date.

The Science of Women

It’s not you. It’s me. As painful as this sounds, it may be true. Human beings are dynamic in nature. We change constantly. This is especially true for emerging adult females—women in their early 20s. A study published in the Journal of Youth Adolescence found that there is a strong link between subjective well-being and attraction in women. A woman that is happy will be more attractive and she will find a happy male to be more attractive. Hiding your feelings is never a good relationship strategy but leading with emotion on your first date probably will not work for the normal female.

The Science of Romance

The most beautiful thing that a woman can say to a man is that she secretes oxytocin when she sees him. Oxytocin is a hormone produced in the brain by the pituitary gland that has been found to effect monogamy in mammals. It is strongly linked to dopamine, the happiness hormone. Oxytocin actually makes a woman perceive you as more attractive. From a neurochemical point of view, the reason that romance is so important is that it creates a cyclic cascade of positive neurochemicals. Make her laugh during the date, and don’t forget about flowers. It’s always a nice gesture to get her a bouquet. If you want to send them to her place of work as a surprise, delivery services like FTD are are trusted resources. Be a gentleman, and keep that oxytocin flowing.

The Science of Love

Yes, it is time to use the L-word. As scary as it may be, if you want the second date it means that you want the third and fourth and fifth. According to researcher Robert Sternberg, there are three dimensions of love; commitment is one along with intimacy and passion. That perfect date will have components of each of these. It means sharing enough to be intimate without oversharing, being physical enough without groping and opening up the possibility that this can be forever. Let the science of dating be the foundation for finding love. Make every date an attempt at discovering happiness.